a season for goodbyes

7 September 2007. The date that all of us have been pinning for. The submission date for the class of 2007, Bath MBA soon-to-be graduates were hoping for. And yet not.

The day that this day comes, means goodbye. For some of us, we probably may not see them ever again. We started drinks at 12, and ended at 12. :) And I spent 3 hours lying on the grass by the lake in school. Then off to Java, and then All-Bar-One, again.

I will miss Bath. And I will miss my time here in school. But it's not just the place that creates the memories, it's the people. Friends whom you meet everyday. It was just like a typical post lecture Friday, all sunny, we were out at Parade Bar drinking. Then some people had to go home. Hugs and kisses were exchanged. And I didn't realise till about 2 hours ago that I may not see some of them in a long time, or even forever.

For some, I wished that I had spent more time getting to know them. For many I wished I had more time to spend with them. And for the class, I just wished that it all didn't have to end with a goodbye.

It brings me closer to go home. The reality of it hit me when I had to pick up my shipping boxes this morning. That I may not come back here forever. It is going to be the same life in Singapore that I had a year back.

My darlings are in the UK as I type, a part of me feels excited to see them, and yet, I haven't packed. And feel no desire to pack. Cos facing them means another tick in my checklist of activities that I have to do before I go home.

S and I are in a really good place now. I think despite his macho, bachelor, commitment-pobia, we really, really get on with each other. I think it is a waste to just throw it away, pending on a job. And yet the reality of the situation is, I cannot afford not start working. I've had the privilege of studying in a foreign land. Something that I never thought I would do or think I'll ever have such an opportunity to do it. No commitments about home, parents or anything, not even money for a long time. And all that seems to crashing down towards the end. It is sad. I wish that I had some brains to be earning shitloads, to live the life that I like.